“Seriously? Seriously, Chris!? You want me to return the Harley-Davidson Iron 883 long-termer and swap it over for a mini-bike? And then take it out for a two-up test with my better half? Let me remind you that our combined ages are close to 110 years (that is two, not three, people – and about nine times the age of the Kawasaki Z125’s intended audience) and together we will weigh 153kg on a bike with 160kg load rating. And you want it photographed in the middle of the busiest weekend outside of the Sydney Olympics? Anything else Chris? Maybe a two-up wheelie and crash into the harbour just to get some coverage on the 7pm news?

I guess Mr Ed didn’t pick up my sarcastic tone (or chose to ignore it), because before I knew it the Harley had disappeared and Kawasaki’s newest, littlest, green thing was in my hands. So, after the 883 was it small, cramped and gutless? No, it was bloody awesome.

For starters, it’s cute in a ‘I want to be star in a Japanese kids movie’ kind of way. Not that my partner Adele gives more than two hoots about riding on a big-screen bike. She only has a couple of golden rules. Number one: if you want to attack a city full of lights, music, restaurants and crowds, make sure it’s a fun ride. Number two (most important): ensure there is enough room on board for the obligatory handbag. After that she’s normally happy, though I didn’t send her a photo to warn her what I was picking her up on.

While the 883 Harley shakes, rattles and rolls along, saturated in cruiser cool, the Teenie Greenie has a very different kind of appeal. And I’ll admit I felt a little nervous as I twisted through the traffic on the way to the pick-up point. In my mind, all I could imagine was how the two of us would look perched on the bike, all knees and elbows and two bowling-ball heads…

However, riding solo for the two kilometres to the rendezvous, I was able to get a feel for the Z125. There are five eternal questions that every teenager in the target will ask (not including “does it cure zits?”), and the answer for all of them was affirmative. The Zed wheelies, does great stoppies, gets through impossible holes, will cost nothing to run, and yes, it will be noticed. Kawasaki didn’t only focus on making this a commuter in the classic David and Goliath mould, it also got the look just right too. The tight underslung muffler, the blacked-out frame and engine look classy as get out.

“Tell me this isn’t the best looking midget in town,” I said to Adele, by way of introduction.

I guess she was rendered speechless by the teenie greenie’s looks too, and she hopped on. From rendezvous to Chinatown the scooter-sized 12-inch wheels didn’t bother me. The suspension easily coped with the panda bear weight on board, though the rebound is on the light side; to be fair, this is probably not what the average Z125 will subjected to in Tokyo. Adele didn’t mind too much that we were hovering on less than 800mm off the tarmac and I hadn’t bothered to make the usual suspension adjustments she encourages.

Off the lights I let out the smoothest, lightest clutch and immediately the 124cc near-horizontal single was away like a cat with a cracker up its clacker. I gave it the best part of full throttle just to get us in the mood and the acceleration was as meaningful and energetic as you’d expect at an under seven’s dirtbike race. After take-off you will never give the fuel injection another thought, as it is so well calibrated – just concentrate on wringing the Zed’s little two-valve heart out.

As the 56mm piston makes increasingly fast trips up the 50mm bore, there’s a corresponding rise in road speed. Not a lot, but surprisingly more than the thumping 883. It winds up from 3000 to 10,000rpm on a pretty trick looking tacho, and before you know it you’re onto second gear. There the Z125 hauls well, even with more than its own weight on board. Acceleration is hearty all the way through the ratio, and the peak power of 7.1kW barely subsides.

By now we have left a few cars behind and caught up with Andrew, our designated third wheel for the evening. We surprised him napping on the latest 1200 Roadster. While we haven’t got room to lounge like him, we still fit well on board, and I keep winding out second. It’s like an adventure-packed story, but the action is not quite fast enough to affect the dialogue. The Meanie gets up to a decent rate of knots and my girl is digging her claws into my handles now – the restricted seat must be a scary perch. I’m sure I bounced a few little valves trying to hang on to the best gear in the ’box.

At this point I was thinking if the go could remain unabated, the Zed would be a ripper. Third just kicked a little harder and longer, just like Saturn five dispensing with another stage burn, and we peaked out towards the speed limit. Maybe I got carried away with the frenzy of third, but luckily the payload was still hanging on. Into fourth and it felt like we could go into orbit – downhill at least!

But when it’s time for re-entry, do Kawasaki’s usual pedal discs – a 200mm single disc at the front and a tiny 184mm at the rear – manage it? They do indeed, and without a hint of twisting or a protest for the weight or abuse we were dishing out. On the little Z, you only need a strong application if you are showing off.

The headlights shine better than their 300 Ninja cousin with plenty of spread and lots of bright white light way up into the darker laneways, though because of the diminutive size you cannot rely on any distracted driver noticing you. The small package and low stature means you have to be on your game, especially at intersections. It didn’t bother me.

An unexpected dream two-up ride turned into a bit of a nightmare when I went to slot it into fifth without reading the manufacturer’s blurb in my inbox, which mentions that the teenie greenie has only four speeds: four for forward motion and the angel’s gear for slyly slipping down back lanes in the Rock’s area. Going downhill in neutral it will peak out at 30km/h and 70km/h felt fine in fourth at a relaxed 6000rpm buzzing along urban streets. I’m told some fat old git managed 108km/h into the redline while slip-streaming a tourist bus. True Stu? Anyway I hit 89km/h returning to the House of Kawasaki.

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Mini-urban motorcycles like the Z125 are nothing new. They have come and gone as fashion has revolved from generation to generation. We had the Honda Z50, the next generation had Gag Bikes, and now the Kawasaki Z125 and the Honda Grom fly the flag of youthful carefree commuting.

I am a first and last impressions guy, and the first few seconds and the last few seconds with the Z125 were exactly the same – I was having fun, even doing one of the most boring things in the world: sitting in traffic. If I owned one I would never let it out of my grip. You need to hold onto the important things in life, and anything that can make you this silly should stay forever.

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TEST RALPH LEAVSEY-MOASE PHOTOGRAPHY ANDREW JONES